A Pornstar’s Guide to Picking Up Women
Pornstars often get asked questions about how men can be successful in picking up women. This doesn’t really make sense to me because we are experts in having performance/fantasy sex, which is known for including awful and extremely unimaginative ways to get women to have sex. Just because we have sex for a living does not mean we know the most effective ways to pick up on women. I feel, as long as people are making this connection between pornstars and expertise on this subject, they are going to get some pretty rotten advice. Yet, because I am a women that gets hit on by men, not because I am a pornstar, I will give you my opinion.
I believe a huge mistake one encounters when approaching the opposite sex is stereotyping them into a gender category; you see this everywhere, “what WOMEN want to hear”, “how to please a MAN”, “what WOMEN look for in a partner”, “why MEN cheat”, etc. Although you can make generalizations about each sex, when it comes to approaching an individual, I feel you should treat them as such. Understand that each women and each man is an individual, and you can’t conveniently categorize them, make general statements about what each one likes, and believe you are going to be successful in your approach.
Asking what SHE wants vs. what WOMEN want is a much more effective way of thinking. Unfortunately, when it comes to picking up women, you don’t have the luxury of asking what she would like to hear before you approach her. So, the discouraging truth is there is no magic line that I can give you which will make picking up women more successful for yourself. But I can recommend that you be casual and simply say hello. It doesn’t always have to be anymore than that. Starting a conversation with someone who piques your interest is the same as starting a conversation with anyone else; the only difference is that you may be nervous. Also, understand there will be times that a women is interested, and there will be times that she is not, and that is okay. Obviously, most people don’t enjoy being rejected, but this is the reality for everyone. If someone is successful with every women they approach, just know, they are not the majority.
As someone who is not an expert in picking up women (if there is such a thing), I hope my advice still resonates with you. Remember that we are all individuals, and not every women you’re approaching wants the same thing. This includes you as well. You are an individual as much as the person you’re trying to talk to; what works for someone else may not work for you. Disregard generic claims of which pick-ups work and which don’t, do not under-estimate simplicity, and most importantly, find what feels natural for you.